Your Kids Are Brats. Babies Need Boot Camp.

"Your kids are spoiled."
"Put that baby down.  Let him cry."
"If you hold them all the time they'll be spoiled rotten."
"You're nursing still?  Past 6 months?  Your kid will never want to be without you."
"They'll never sleep if you don't let them cry it out."
"Babywearing?  Eh, a stroller is more convenient."
"Nursing past 12 months?!?  Your child is going to remember and be scarred for life."


ATTENTION WORLD: KIDS WHO ARE ATTACHED TO THEIR MOTHERS ARE NOT SPOILED.

I'll give a list of symptoms of spoiled-itis and a list of things that do not make up a spoiled child.

NOT Spoiled Brats:

• Any child under a year old.
• An infant who wants his mother.
• A nursing baby who needs his mother.
• A nursling who wants to nurse to go to sleep.
• A child who wants to be held.
• A child who wants to be worn.
• A child who cries when they're separated from their mother.
• A baby who cries often.
• A toddler having a "fit" (does ANYONE have a toddler who hasn't had a tantrum here and there?.. I will never understand why the world deems a frustrated toddler a spoiled child).
• A toddler drawing on the wall.
• A toddler who cries in the store.
• A child who needs to hear their mother's heartbeat to feel safe.
• A child who would rather sit in their mother's lap than in a high chair at a restaurant.
• A child that cannot be left overnight.
• A child that wants their "boo-boos" kissed.
• A child that has to have a story before bed.
• I have lots more.  Email me if you want them.

SPOILED "BRATTY" Person:

• A teen who has a fit because he didn't get the car he wanted on his 16th birthday.
• A tween who counts the Christmas presents for himself and his siblings/cousins and loudly proclaims that he's angry that someone has more than him.
• A person who laughs at another child because he's different when he knows better.
• A person who thinks less of another person because they're in a different social class.
• A person of any age who thinks that they are better than others.
• A person of any age who has an entitled attitude.
• A person of any age who doesn't see fellow human beings as equals.  ALL fellow human beings.
• Someone who thinks rules don't apply to them.
• A person who doesn't care how the words they say affect the people around them.
• Someone who never develops a super-ego out of pure selfishness and lack of desire to stop believing that the world revolves around them alone.

I am so sick and tired of people saying that babies are "manipulative", "spoiled", and "brats" when all they want is to be securely attached to their parents.  There is nothing wrong with holding your child.  You can't hold them too much.  You simply can't.  If they don't want to be without you, just know that you should enjoy every second of it because it won't last for long.  In fact, because babies and children are shown respect by parents who are always available to them, they develop independence much earlier than those who are left to cry and "work it out" on their own.  This is because they know that if they need their caregiver, they will be there for them as they have been their whole life.  Makes sense, huh?

Toddlers who have "fits" are not "spoiled brats" either.  They are usually frustrated because they cannot adequately express the emotions they are feeling.  Put yourself in their shoes and see if you would behave much better.  I wouldn't.

It's a simple fact that children who are brought up in a peaceful and respectful manner typically grow into peaceful and respectful adults.  While children who are brought up in a selfish, "me first", "My mommy lets me cry at night because she wants me to be asleep on her schedule", inconsiderate, inconsistent, "They love me sometimes, and aren't there for me other times" environment, often grow up to be inconsiderate, bratty, selfish, unkind adults.  Not always, but I would venture to say a lot of the time.  Unless, of course, they research and educate themselves and decide to break the cycle with their children.

So.  Don't tell me that my kids are brats.  Don't tell me that the scribble on my wall isn't art (not saying that I don't take a Magic Eraser to it), don't tell me that my almost two year old is a "brat" because she can't say what she wants and she has a tantrum, don't tell me that my five year old is spoiled because he still likes to sit with his mom and dad and get cuddles, don't tell me that I'm holding my infant too much and that I should let her cry herself to sleep, don't tell me that my kids are brats.  Because they aren't.  They're kids.  Kids who are respected and loved and revere their Mama T-Rex as their protector.  Because I am.  Short arms and all.