Your Kids Are Brats. Babies Need Boot Camp.

"Your kids are spoiled."
"Put that baby down.  Let him cry."
"If you hold them all the time they'll be spoiled rotten."
"You're nursing still?  Past 6 months?  Your kid will never want to be without you."
"They'll never sleep if you don't let them cry it out."
"Babywearing?  Eh, a stroller is more convenient."
"Nursing past 12 months?!?  Your child is going to remember and be scarred for life."


ATTENTION WORLD: KIDS WHO ARE ATTACHED TO THEIR MOTHERS ARE NOT SPOILED.

I'll give a list of symptoms of spoiled-itis and a list of things that do not make up a spoiled child.

NOT Spoiled Brats:

• Any child under a year old.
• An infant who wants his mother.
• A nursing baby who needs his mother.
• A nursling who wants to nurse to go to sleep.
• A child who wants to be held.
• A child who wants to be worn.
• A child who cries when they're separated from their mother.
• A baby who cries often.
• A toddler having a "fit" (does ANYONE have a toddler who hasn't had a tantrum here and there?.. I will never understand why the world deems a frustrated toddler a spoiled child).
• A toddler drawing on the wall.
• A toddler who cries in the store.
• A child who needs to hear their mother's heartbeat to feel safe.
• A child who would rather sit in their mother's lap than in a high chair at a restaurant.
• A child that cannot be left overnight.
• A child that wants their "boo-boos" kissed.
• A child that has to have a story before bed.
• I have lots more.  Email me if you want them.

SPOILED "BRATTY" Person:

• A teen who has a fit because he didn't get the car he wanted on his 16th birthday.
• A tween who counts the Christmas presents for himself and his siblings/cousins and loudly proclaims that he's angry that someone has more than him.
• A person who laughs at another child because he's different when he knows better.
• A person who thinks less of another person because they're in a different social class.
• A person of any age who thinks that they are better than others.
• A person of any age who has an entitled attitude.
• A person of any age who doesn't see fellow human beings as equals.  ALL fellow human beings.
• Someone who thinks rules don't apply to them.
• A person who doesn't care how the words they say affect the people around them.
• Someone who never develops a super-ego out of pure selfishness and lack of desire to stop believing that the world revolves around them alone.

I am so sick and tired of people saying that babies are "manipulative", "spoiled", and "brats" when all they want is to be securely attached to their parents.  There is nothing wrong with holding your child.  You can't hold them too much.  You simply can't.  If they don't want to be without you, just know that you should enjoy every second of it because it won't last for long.  In fact, because babies and children are shown respect by parents who are always available to them, they develop independence much earlier than those who are left to cry and "work it out" on their own.  This is because they know that if they need their caregiver, they will be there for them as they have been their whole life.  Makes sense, huh?

Toddlers who have "fits" are not "spoiled brats" either.  They are usually frustrated because they cannot adequately express the emotions they are feeling.  Put yourself in their shoes and see if you would behave much better.  I wouldn't.

It's a simple fact that children who are brought up in a peaceful and respectful manner typically grow into peaceful and respectful adults.  While children who are brought up in a selfish, "me first", "My mommy lets me cry at night because she wants me to be asleep on her schedule", inconsiderate, inconsistent, "They love me sometimes, and aren't there for me other times" environment, often grow up to be inconsiderate, bratty, selfish, unkind adults.  Not always, but I would venture to say a lot of the time.  Unless, of course, they research and educate themselves and decide to break the cycle with their children.

So.  Don't tell me that my kids are brats.  Don't tell me that the scribble on my wall isn't art (not saying that I don't take a Magic Eraser to it), don't tell me that my almost two year old is a "brat" because she can't say what she wants and she has a tantrum, don't tell me that my five year old is spoiled because he still likes to sit with his mom and dad and get cuddles, don't tell me that I'm holding my infant too much and that I should let her cry herself to sleep, don't tell me that my kids are brats.  Because they aren't.  They're kids.  Kids who are respected and loved and revere their Mama T-Rex as their protector.  Because I am.  Short arms and all.

Fat Fat Fatty.

*I normally use this blog to talk about peaceful parenting and my journey through parenting but I want to use it for something different today. Humor me.


My whole body jiggles when I vigorously towel dry my hair.

Sometimes I have a muffin top.

I have cellulite on my thighs.

I have stretch mark scars on my belly.

My boobs are small.

When I stop waving, my upper arms keep going at it.

Depending on how I hold my face I have a double chin.

My hips are wide.

My butt is big.

I'm not "perfectly" toned and sculpted.

But my body is HOT.
Awesomely, amazingly hot.
Know why?  Because my body was able to carry, birth, and nourish two children.  I'm not toned like the girls on TV or magazines.  But my body is absolutely amazing.  I'm not ashamed of my stretch marks.  Because they are a reminder of the beautiful beings who grew in my belly.

I'm a size 12/14.  And I'm good with that.  I feel amazing.  And I love my body.  Even when I was a size 20 I felt good.  Because I know who I am.  I know what my amazing body can do.  It can give and sustain life.  That's pretty incredible.

So, although my body isn't what Hollywood producers would call "hot", it is.  Who cares what they say?

So I will:
Wear a bikini (and work it).

Have some dessert when I want it.

Wear awesome jeans---Ladies!  Do NOT forfeit to mom jeans!

Walk right up into Victoria's Secret and wear my purchase with pride.

Walk into a room like I'm the most beautiful thing ever and own it.


Because, GUESS WHAT?  I'm not a fat fat fatty, world!  And neither are the rest of these amazing, beautiful mothers who have gone through pregnancy, childbirth, and are nursing or have nursed.  We're hot.  Our stretch marks are hot.  Our wide hips are hot.  Because our bodies can do amazing things.

"I'm so crafty I make people." ~Don't know who the quote is by.. but they're brilliant.

Kids Misbehaving? SPANK 'EM!

You have spank your kids.
You're doing the rest of the world a disservice if you don't.
You know, even the Bible says "Spare the rod, spoil the child".

These are several of the things I have heard from people.  I'm not going to say I have never spanked.  That would be untrue.  In fact, I got a lot of misguided advice from misguided people and I listened so spanking used to be our main form of discipline for Logan

I don't believe I've mentioned it before, but I'm a Christian.  And a mom.  And I hear often that it's in the Bible that you must spank your children.  Well, I'd like to share my viewpoint on spanking and the Christian parent.  Because some people think that they have to spank their children because the "Bible says so".  That's untrue.  "Spare the rod, spoil the child" is actually not a scripture at all.  It's a quote derived from a scripture and I think it's misconstrued.

If one of you can find one single scripture that clearly says that you must spank your children in order to raise them in a Christian manner, please show it to me.  Because I haven't found one.

Now, on to the whole thing about the "rod" and raising children.
The Bible says:
 "He who spares the rod hates his son but he who loves him is careful to discipline him." Proverbs 12:24
"The rod and rebuke give wisdom.." Proverbs 22:15

In biblical times a "rod" was something that shepherds used to guide their sheep and keep predators away.

1. Shepherds used their tool to guide their sheep.  They didn't beat the sheep with the rod.  They used it to steer them and keep them on the proper path.  I think this is pretty self explanatory.  Use gentle discipline to guide your children and keep them on the path that they should go.
2. Shepherds used the rod to beat predators in order to keep them away from their flocks.   The allusion here is also evident.  Use your position, maturity, life experience, and authority to keep your child from harm.  Use your tools to keep your children safe from the things that may harm them.

Another meaning of the word "rod" is a stout walking stick.  This was used to assist it's owner in maneuvering and climbing rocky or difficult terrain.  Again, nothing is struck with the rod in this scenario.

A rod is also used as a scepter of authority or symbol of a king's power.  I interpret this to mean that, while treating your child with respect and dignity, they must know that you are in charge and that the boundaries you set for them should be adhered to.

The term "rod of correction" is also used in the Bible.  It says "Do not withhold discipline from a child; if you punish them with the rod, they will not die" Proverbs 23:13
The Bible does not lie.  I believe every single word of it.
Fact: An estimated 1,740 children a year die in the US because of corporal punishment.  
The Bible is true.  The whole, entire thing.  Every word.  So, this clearly means that we are to guide our children with a metaphorical rod.  Not a literal one.  No child has ever died because their parents used guidelines, gentle discipline, and loving guidance.

One last point.
When "rod" is used in the Shebet passages in Proverbs, say "authority" every single time you come across the word "rod".  It fits every single time.  God speaks of His rod.  He guides us and molds us (and I am thankful!) but I've never personally been literally slapped by God.  I don't think any of us have.


"All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the servant of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work." —2 Timothy 3:16-17


Oops!  I thought I was done and something else occurred to me as I was about to push the "publish" button.  


“Even though I walk through the darkest valley, I fear no evil; for you are with me; your rod and your staff—they comfort me.” Psalm 23:4


Now, the rod of God is comfort to me.  His guidance and wisdom and boundaries and love and discipline.  They are all a comfort to me.  Would God make us lie down in green pastures and then beat us with a stick? NO.  If God used a rod to beat me, I would have to say that it wouldn't be a comfort to me..  Such is the case with our children.  We use boundaries, guidelines, and love to teach them and lead them in the right direction and they are comforted by our presence and the presence of their boundaries.  

Foundations

"They may forget what you said.  But they will never forget how you made them feel."
 ~Carl W.Buechner


One of my all time favorite quotes.  Because it's so true.  A child is so resilient yet so fragile.  A person's self worth is rapidly developing in their first few years of life.  Why do so many people have such a low self image?  Why do so many people think they're worthless?  Why do so many people have to soul search and go to counseling just so that they can free themselves and be truly happy?  The answer is probably "Because when they were a child, someone crushed their spirit.  Or at least tried to."


Raise your hand if you ever had a teacher (or other adult) make you feel embarrassed or worthless as a child.   Do you think it was intentional?  I had a teacher who completely humiliated me and broke me down and made me feel like I was nothing.  Every single day.  And I was only in second grade.  SECOND. GRADE.


I think a lot of us don't check our tone or our words when we're speaking to children.  I'm guilty of raising my voice and such from time to time.  Is it my kids' fault?  No.. It's usually because I'm having a stressful day or I have too much on my plate in that very moment.  So a simple request for juice can provoke a "JUST a MINUTE PLEASE!" from me.. I always feel badly and apologize and explain to my child that I was busy in the moment and that it wasn't their fault that I got upset.  


Why do adults feel that they have the right to break a child's spirit?  Why do some people think that it's acceptable to slap a child or scream at them?  


All this talk about teens committing suicide and people having to go through hours and hours of intensive therapies and I can't help but think "Maybe if they had an adult in their life who had shown them that they are loved and cherished they would be okay.  Maybe if someone hadn't felt superior enough to talk down to them or abuse them then they wouldn't be thinking about ending it all".  


Adults don't treat one another like they sometimes treat children.  Adults tend to treat one another with respect and dignity and.. well--like human beings.  Folks, children are people too.  They're smaller than us.  They're younger than us.  They're more adventurous and energetic and understanding and kind.  But they're people all the same.  Children aren't the future, they're the NOW.  And if they are treated like they are inferior then they will grow to believe they are inferior.  Then we're left with a world full of adults who think that they have nothing to offer.  Sounds pretty hopeless, huh?


How would you feel if you walked in to work late and your boss yelled at you with his finger in your face while he towered a good three feet above you?  Then, frazzled, you try to do your very best to make him happy and win his approval back.  But, in your haste to please him, you spill his coffee on his lap.  Then he stands right up and just gives you a big 'ol SMACK and tells you to go isolate yourself from your co-workers and friends.  Then they all tease you.  


That would be our life if we had to live adult scenarios in a child's day to day.  Not ALL children.  I'd venture to say that probably not even the majority.  But ONE adult that makes a child feel like they are nothing is all it takes.  It doesn't have to be a parent.  It can be a teacher, doctor, family member, babysitter, daycare worker, etc.. 


We have to be sure that we build a strong foundation for our children to stand on.  We have to make sure they are steadfast in knowing that they are unique and amazing.  Because they are.  And they deserve dignified treatment and the utmost respect.  So give it to them.  Remember, good or bad: They may not remember exactly what you said but they will remember how it made them feel.  

Parenting Report Card

Some of you may know that I follow Attachment Parenting guidelines (pretty much.. it suits us in 99.999% of our lifestyle).  One of my greatest weaknesses is trying not to judge the way other people parent their children.  It's not that I think my way is better.. I guess I just think "Attachment parenting works so well, why would anyone want to do anything else?".
So, I've been trying to be observant in outings and things and I've made notes of a few things I've seen and compiled a "parenting report card" which is basically a list of things that I liked and disliked when I saw.
Judgmental?  Eh, maybe.  BUT, I once read something similar and it made a lightbulb go off for me.. I realized that others DO notice how we parent in public.

Okay.. On with it.


A-  A child was having an emotional breakdown in the produce section of Wal-Mart.  Instead of yelling at the child, hitting the child, or ignoring the behavior completely, the mom stopped what she was doing and crouched down to the child's level.  I'm not sure what she said word for word so I'll paraphrase based on what I heard her say:
Johnny, I understand that you're upset that we didn't _____ but instead of acting this way, you could use your words to let me know how you feel.  Sometimes we have to do things we don't like but instead of yelling and crying we have to use our words.


B-  A man (I'm assuming he was Dad) stomped the breaks in the carpool line when he realized his child left her lunch box in their van.  Although he clogged up the carpool line, he made sure that his child had their lunch and a hug before she went to class.  It warmed my heart.

C-  I was volunteering at the school and a woman picked her child up early.  The child was excited and trying to tell her mother about her day.  The mom was on her phone and kept saying "Shhhh.. We'll talk later".  And then the kid just gave up and the excitement went away. :(  At least the mom acknowledged her and told her they'd talk later?

D- I saw a grandma at a stoplight smoking in the car with the windows up with two (twins?)  infants in the car.  Yes, I know that calls for a huge, big fat F--- but the following F is worse.  Maybe?  Maybe they're tied for Fs.  Yes, tied for F's but we're going to call it a D for OCD's sake.


F-  A man, woman, and little boy (he looked to be close in age to Logan, so I'm guessing he was about 5) were in Cici's pizza.  The little boy was so full of life and so excited and he chattered on and on waiting for someone to acknowledge him or validate him.. The woman just kept stuffing her face.  She didn't look at him or talk to him.  Neither did the man.  Until he got fed up with the chatter and told his little boy to "Shut the f*** up!".  The light in the little boy's eyes died and he was broken.  It killed my heart.  The little boy sat eating silently, shadowing his parents until he decided to try again.  "Can I play games in the arcade after I eat?"  --No answer--  "Mom?  Dad?  Can I play games after I eat?"  --No answer--  "Mom? Da..."  Then the "dad" pounds his fist on the table and hisses "I thought I told you to SHUT. UP.  We can't even eat in peace!  No you can't play games and you should have known better than to ask!  You can't keep your mouth shut for five minutes!!"  I wanted  to say something.. But I couldn't.  I was too chicken.  So I just got my slice of dessert pizza, smiled at the broken boy, and went back to my peaceful, happy booth.    I was ashamed that I didn't have the guts to stand up.  But I so wish I had.  I don't even think those parents realized what they were doing to their child!


So,  share this in hopes that people DO notice how others parent in public.  And people DO know that public parenting is a tame version of what goes on at home usually.  And I hope this gets around to my "F" parents.  Because I want them to know they're wrong.  

I Love SCIENCE!

First off: in awesome, breaking news, Logan sounded out his very first word last night. "Jill".  He was so incredibly proud of himself.  It "clicked" and he gets it now.  Tonight he sounded out "Zac" "rat" "mit" "hen" and "ball".  Awesome sauce.

--Okay.. On to the good stuff--


So, for homeschooling, my dear friend (who happens to be an AMAZING teacher and my mentor) suggested that I use the NC public school curriculum to create Logan's lesson plans.  Awesome idea.  And if it saves me money I'm on it like gravy on mashed potatoes.
So, here I am doing lesson plans and Logan comes in the living room (with his hand in his pants of course.. new thing of his.).


Mama?
Yes?
What'cha doin?
Making lesson plans.
What are those?
Things that will help you and I when you start learning at home.
Oh.


Then he went back in his room.  I heard lots of crashing and Transformer names.  Then he sang Jingle Bells.  He came back in the living room (hand in pants again).


Mama?
Yesssss?
Um..  Are we going to do science?
Sure!
Okay.


Then he went back in his room.  I heard jumping on the bed, more Transformer talk, and then: "I'm King of the WHOLE WORRRRRLLLLD!!!".  Then he came back in the living room (yes, his hand was still in his pants.. I started to wonder if he was playing with his toys with one hand and keeping the other in his pants.  I decided I wouldn't ask..)


Mama?
Yesssss?
I have an idea..  You might not like it.
What's your idea bud?
Um.  It's a science idea.
Okay.. What is it?
Can we figure out why farts make bubbles in the tub?
Sure kid.  We can try.


Then he trotted off merrily into his room shouting "I'm gonna learn about FA-A-ARTS!".
What a kid.

In other news, Laney loves Starfall.com.  Check it out if you get a chance.  It's a wonderful learning resource and it's fun. Who knows?  Maybe I'll have a kid who's ahead of the game one of these days.

Son of Light

That's what Lucifer means, right?

Well, my sister, brother-in-law, their wee one, and my kids and I all went to a local pizza parlor.  My brother-in-law had Logan absolutely convinced that his real name was Lucifer and that "Logan" was just short.  Like Jess for Jessica or Harry for Harold.  Anyway, it was quite hilarious.  When we were leaving we came clean and told Logan that his name was actually Logan.. not Lucifer.

He's a name nerd and wanted to know "what Lucifer means".  --Awkward pause--
Umm..I'm not sure what to tell you, son.
Why? Does it mean "eats boogers" or something?
No...
Well tell me mama.


So I did.  I told him the story of the name Lucifer.  How it was Satan's name when he was still an angel and that it means "Son of Light".  But that he was cast out of Heaven because he was evil and then his name became Satan.

Then Logan was quiet for almost a whole five minutes (a record, maybe?)


Mama?
What Logan?
Um.  Why is Lucifer a bad name?  Why didn't you want to tell me what it meant?
Because.  I just felt a little weird telling you about the devil and I wasn't sure how much of it you would understand.
Well, I understand it all.  And I wouldn't have been mad if you had named me Lucifer.  Because it means "Son of Light".  I like it.  And it matches me.


Indeed it does.  He teaches me something new every day.  And he could very well have been named Lucifer.  And it would have fit.  "Son of Light" describes his vivacious spirit, thirst for knowledge, and all around attitude pretty well.  Plus Lucifer is said to have been an absolutely gorgeous angel.  He's right.  Lucifer fits him.  BUT, I don't like how it also means "fallen angel".  Logan is an angel indeed, but as long as I'm breathing he will not fall.  At least not without me there to catch him.


Yes, Lucifer certainly fits him better than Logan (which means "hollow"--he's anything but) but I like to think we're redefining the name he was given.

What's Beautiful?

What is beautiful?  What does that word even mean?  How are we supposed to teach our kids what beauty is when it's all a matter of what's appealing to us as individuals? Hm.

Growing up I always felt a bit like an ugly duckling.. I don't know why.  The adults in my life always told me that I was cute and--looking back at photos--I actually was a pretty doggone lovely kid.  It's just one of "those things".  BUT when your kid asks you "What does beautiful mean?" what do you say?  .. I'm lost on that one.  Because I don't know what to tell him.  I don't have any examples to give him.  I always tell my children that they're beautiful.  So, in my cluelessness, I just told him the only thing I could think of: Beautiful things are things your eyes like to look at.  Things that make you happy inside when you see them.
Before the pitchforks, etc, come out let me say that I have discussed inner beauty with him and he grasps that concept.  Because it's pretty cut and dry.  People with love, kindness, empathy, etc.. in their hearts possess inner beauty.  People who are crabby and lie and kick puppies and stuff aren't beautiful on the inside..

--Ahem. Back to the point--


So, I found myself lost trying to explain to my child what beauty really is.. And then he showed me..
According to my five year old, this is what makes someone beautiful:

• When someone smiles and you can see how pretty they are inside.  Like, not down their throat.  But in their heart.
• When someone cares about how other people feel. (But, Logan, doesn't that mean that they're beautiful on the inside and not the outside?  "Mama, when someone is beautiful on the inside, it makes me happy to look at their outside.  That's what beautiful is, right?")
• Nice teeth.
• Brushed hair.

Hm.. Not one mention of cellulite, hair color, skin color, nose size, pants size, how they look in a swimsuit or cocktail dress, double chins, chicken legs, or acne.  My kid just taught me something.  A HUGE something.  Whodathunk?

So, my attempt at being All Knowing Super Mom actually resulted in me learning what outer beauty is.  Hopefully my son will carry these ideas of beauty with him his whole life and while he's looking for a spouse or for friends he will be sure to choose beautiful (by his standards) people.

YES, they're that adorable.

Laney gets mad at Logan and screams at him. Sometimes so hard she farts.

Logan always shares his treasure box goodies with his sister.  Lots of other kids eat theirs right away but he never fails to stick his in his backpack and wait until I pick him up in carpool just so that he can share with his sister.

They tell jokes.  And laugh until they can't breathe.  Okay.. Logan does all the telling because Laney isn't so great with words just yet, but you get my drift.  Example:  "Why is the emu purple?  CAUSE HE DRANK TOO MUCH GRAPE JUICE!!!!!" This is followed by the aforementioned laughter.  And then another cheesy joke.

Logan is so funny about the way he looks.  His new thing is headbands.. The kind that look like sweatbands sort of.  He picks one that matches with his outfit and thinks he's all kinds of pimpin.

When someone farts Laney yells "BIBBIT!" (ribbit).

They both love to hide in the cabinet under the sink.  Logan takes a flashlight and the occasional book.  The more frantic I get while looking for them, the quieter they are.

There's so much more.

So, you see, my kids are absolutely amazing.

But HE's Tockin'!

"HE'S tockin'!"
That's what Laney yelled in church today when I told her to "shhhh".  She was talking--urm...yelling--in reference to the pastor.  He was talking.  And I shushed her.  No fair.

This was our first Sunday at the new church.  We love it there.  The people are adorable and friendly.

Logan had a ton of fun with his new friends in children's church.  They all loved him and didn't mind his incessant talking, fidgeting, and getting out of his chair.  They didn't think he was broken.  They adored him.  He feels accepted there and it feels good.  He can't wait to go back.

Why my kids have labels..

The school told me my son was broken.  And his doctor confirmed it.  He has severe ADHD.  I refuse to put him through the torture of pharmaceutical medicines because I don't want his serotonin levels to be messed with.  That preludes a lifetime full of serotonin imbalances and more medicines to help treat it.  So we skip the pills.  And the schools hate me for it.  So, in January--after all the Christmas stuff is done at school, I'm pulling Logan out and we will homeschool.  I'm excited.  The only part that makes me nervous is the whole "homeschool kids are socially awkward" thing.  But, let's face it, I went to public school for thirteen years and I'm socially awkward..

Laney has Celiac Disease.  It took several months to diagnose her.  First it was "normal" crying, then gas, then colic, then reflux, then GERD, then an allergy of some sort (that they couldn't find of course), and on and on and on. Then I was told that it was my boob milk and that she HAD to be on formula.   By the time she was 8 months old she weighed 9lbs 2oz and was diagnosed "Failure to Thrive".  All the while she was nursing almost non stop.  SO. I took her to the most amazing, prestigious, equipped hospital I could find and they diagnosed her with Celiac Disease.  I eliminated gluten from my diet and hers and she gained 10lbs in one month.  So, now she's "fixed" and I'm thankful for the doctors that finally gave us the correct diagnosis.  But now we're being pressured (and have been for months) to get a colon biopsy.  I refuse to make her undergo that because it's unnecessary.  She just doesn't eat gluten.  And it works for us.  I will not force her to have a piece of her colon pinched off just so they can label her broken.  She just doesn't eat gluten.  And it works.  End of story.  No need to pinch off a piece of her butthole after she hasn't eaten for over 24 hours and has been put under anesthesia and forced to drink something that tastes like crap.  She's been through enough.  And I'm the mama and I say that she will not have to endure that at 20 months old.

They say my kids are broken

‎"Your kids are broken" they tell me.
"Both of them" they say.

One of them isn't growing like we like,
The other one can't learn to read and write.

"They're behind" they tell me again
"in ways that baffle our minds"


‎"There's no chapter on them in our books,
they are too 'one of a kind'."

I listen intently to their slurs
and wonder what went wrong.

I realized that it was nothing
These adults were just ding dongs.

I tried to stop the words from coming
but they would not be subdued.

I said as calmly as I could,
"I've something to tell you:
My children are loving, respectful, and kind
you say these things because you fear it.
How dare you say my kids are broken?
You're trying to break their spirit.
I will not allow it,
nor sit idly by
while you try to make them 'normal'
and tell them not to cry
Or laugh or giggle or get out of their chair
or mismatch their clothes or spike their hair.
My kids aren't cookie cutter
but they are amazing.
Instead of critiquing
You should be praising.
They're wonderful little people
they see right through you when they look.
That terrifies you
and that's why you try to fit them in a book."